Maths teacher jokes
OK, so the title says it all – the really sad thing is that these all made my colleagues (and me) chuckle. So here goes:
1) What do you call a hungry parrot? (Any ideas?)
2) a) What do you get if you cross a cat with a dog? b) What do you get if you cross a mountaineer with a mosquito? (see below)
3) So x-squared and e-to-the-x go to a disco, and they’re both having a bop. X-squared is having a wonderful time, dancing away, really getting into his groove, but e-to-the-x is looking pretty miserable. X-squared notices this and goes over – “Come on, we’re here to have fun – cheer up!” “Oh, everything seems the same, I really can’t be bothered.” Concerned about his friend, x-squared tries to encourage him some more “You just need to integrate.” “But would that change anything?”
4) Two professors in a restaurant, one is complaining about the dumbing down of maths – “No-one can do maths these days apart from specialists.” “I don’t believe you, the general population is more mathematically literate than ever before,” replies his friend. They argue for a while, and then the grumpy one heads off to the toilet. Immediately he’s out of sight the second professor calls the waitress over and tells her to reply “1/3 x-cubed” when she is asked what the integral of x-squared is. The friend comes back and the waitress is called over, apparently out of the blue Prof Grump is prompted to ask her for the integral of x-squared. “1/3 x-cubed” she dutifully replies. And then, as she’s leaving the table adds “and a constant”.
Ooh – and the answers to No 2 – a) cat dog sin theta, and b) you can’t cross a scalar and a vector.
one comment:
I like the waitress one and the scalar/vector but I just didn’t get the cat and dog one. What this tells me, I think, is that my maths is rubbish and I need linguistic prompts.Would your pupils get the jokes?
Fi () (link) - 08 October '05 - 13:34
