Personal Breakthrough
This was prompted by a comment that Kathryn left on Ruth’s blog about her not being overweight. She’s not, she’s very clearly not. And I finally got it through my thick head that neither am I. When I was in my 20s and early 30s I was very thin – scarily thin at times (at one point I went down to 7st 3 – that’s just 101 pounds or about 46 kg – I’m 5’4” – this was definitely underweight) and I’ve struggled with my body image since having 2 children. I’m now about 9 st 6 (132 pounds, 57kg), my Body Mass Index is 22.7 – well within the normal healthy range. So why have I persisted in believing that I’m fat? Because I’m almost 40 rather than 20 – and I’ve had 2 children – that does something to a body. So my new mantra is “I’m not fat, I’m just not 20 any more.” And when I eat chocolate – I’m going to enjoy it and not feel guilty. (Speaking of which – Montezuma’s chocolates – swooooooooon!!)
four comments:
Good.Good, good, good.
I have just posted another silly blog about how ugly I am – I’m rather concerned at the moment with how I look – and part of this is to do with age and the natural change in the way one looks.
I have to say that I LOVE my food – and I struggle to eat a healthy diet because I love fattening things so much. But I have decided that the extra pounds on the waiste-line are actually worth it if the food is making me happy.
I have just enjoyed a bit of custard tart and tonight I will indulge in some fine wine (i.e. £5 a bottle!!!) as I sit and watch the TV. AND I shall have some chocolate mousse too. Bliss.
Big Ruth () (link) - 23 June '06 - 18:40
57 kg and nearly 40! That’s definitely far from fat! You deserve your chocolate!!!Marie () (link) - 23 June '06 - 19:34
How liberating! I haven’t given birth to any children (adoption leaves fewer stretch marks) but my body at 38 is changing as well. I am a few pounds heavier than I was last year at this time, but I’m not terribly stressed about it. The thing I notice about other people is not how thin or fat they are, but how comfortable they appear to be in their own skin.Work it.
jessie () (link) - 24 June '06 - 01:49
Stunning coincidence!I was 7st 5lbs well into my mid 20s and convinced I was fat and ugly. After having our four children in quick succession and then forgetting to stop eating as if pregnant and/or breastfeeding, I suddenly realised I wasn’t happy at all at 12st 4lb, but portion control was all I needed, still eating the gastronomic delights and drinking the fine wines I love. I was lucky and lost 2st 7lbs (with no thrashing at the gym) and now hover between 9st 11lbs and 10st, but I’m happier than I’ve ever been and my depression is far away at the moment. Why? Because, at 38, I’ve finally found what other, older women have talked about, that inner calm and acceptance that comes with age and wisdom. 40s are nothing to be afraid of but the self-confidence and contentment is to be embraced and relished. Bring it on!
Louise - 24 June '06 - 10:06
